"Any man can be a father, but it takes a special person to be a dad."
3 days prior to his death, my dad was carried by an ambulance to the hospital. That same night, I went home to assist mom in taking care of him. He has not been eating for several days, became very weak and had edema of the feet.
He was initially in a semi-private room as there was allegedly no vacant private room when he got to the hospital. The next morning, I
During his confinement at the hospital, he frequently hallucinated and started talking to his brothers, Tito Boy and Tito Carding. Both of them already passed away several years ago. He may have seen them, or they may be calling on him to be with them, but dad wasn't ready. Not yet.
Dad needed a bag of type AB+ blood since according to his doctor, he was anemic. It was a difficult blood type to find. Luckily, 1 bag was available in another hospital which we needed to pick up ASAP. As a matter of policy, 1 person needs to donate blood in exchange of the blood we took, so I volunteered. They took 450 cc.
Several tests after the blood transfusion, the doctor said he noticed some improvement but said 1 more bag of blood was needed. Despite this, dad started to show some appetite. He said he wanted coconut juice, so I
went out looking for it. When I went back to the hospital, he took about
a couple of sips. We were happy. He was regaining his appetite.
Despite the fact that dad's blood type was difficult to find, we were lucky to be able to get one from the same hospital where we got the first bag. This time, my brother donated blood in exchange of the second bag. My brother delivered the second bag to the hospital and was immediately transfused to dad.
Dad can eat anything he wanted. He was improving. He wanted to get out of his bed, probably due to boredom, but mom wouldn't allow him. He needed to rest to regain his strength.
The next day, the nurse and mom gave dad a complete bed bath so he'd feel more comfortable. The nurse shaved dad's mustache because it gets in the way of the oxygen tube. Mom cut his grown fingernails.
I and my nephew, Christian, bought apples, watermelon and oranges for dad. When we arrived at the hospital, I asked the nurse if my dad was allowed to eat an apple, the nurse said yes. When I went back to dad's room, we asked him if he wanted an apple. He said yes.
Mom gave dad bite sized apple, one at a time. 1 bite sized apple, 1 sip of water, i bite sized apple, 1 sip of gatorade... When mom asked if he wanted more, he nodded. He finished 1/4 of the apple, then took his medicine. He asked to change the TV channel to channel 14, I did. He watched tv.
Few minutes later, he looked sleepy and was slowly closing his eyes. He was always sleeping at the hospital so I didn't think it was unusual that he looks sleepy. Then mom suddenly got nervous and loudly said "Precious, di na yata humihinga Daddy mo!!" (Precious, your Daddy does not seem to be breathing anymore!!). I didn't believe my mom at first because I didn't see dad gasp for air or choke or anything -- he just closed his eyes as if to sleep! Nevertheless, I immediately hit the emergency button, then the nurse on duty came running to check on dad. The nurse hurriedly went out of the room and less than a minute later, nurses and doctor with medical equipments came rushing.
Mom, Christian and I went out of the room to let the medical team do their job. We just stayed outside the room and watched as the nurses get in and out of dad's room, running here and there. carrying this and that. It was agonizing to watch those things as they happen. I can hear my heartbeat. I didn't know what to do.
After about 30 minutes, the nurses were no longer in a hurry and was leaving dad's room one by one.. I knew then that dad was gone, because otherwise, it would have been easy to know judging from the nurses' reactions -- but I was still hopeful. Maybe the nurses were no longer in a hurry because dad was ok.. Maybe.. I hope. I don't know.
Few minutes later, he looked sleepy and was slowly closing his eyes. He was always sleeping at the hospital so I didn't think it was unusual that he looks sleepy. Then mom suddenly got nervous and loudly said "Precious, di na yata humihinga Daddy mo!!" (Precious, your Daddy does not seem to be breathing anymore!!). I didn't believe my mom at first because I didn't see dad gasp for air or choke or anything -- he just closed his eyes as if to sleep! Nevertheless, I immediately hit the emergency button, then the nurse on duty came running to check on dad. The nurse hurriedly went out of the room and less than a minute later, nurses and doctor with medical equipments came rushing.
Mom, Christian and I went out of the room to let the medical team do their job. We just stayed outside the room and watched as the nurses get in and out of dad's room, running here and there. carrying this and that. It was agonizing to watch those things as they happen. I can hear my heartbeat. I didn't know what to do.
After about 30 minutes, the nurses were no longer in a hurry and was leaving dad's room one by one.. I knew then that dad was gone, because otherwise, it would have been easy to know judging from the nurses' reactions -- but I was still hopeful. Maybe the nurses were no longer in a hurry because dad was ok.. Maybe.. I hope. I don't know.
I asked one of the nurses if dad was ok, he said, the doctor will talk to us.The doctor came out a few minutes later, It's time for us to know. She slowly said she was sorry, and that she tried to revive dad for 30 minutes and did everything she could, but his heart just stopped beating. and he was gone.
We went inside the room -- dad was just lying in bed. He was not moving. He was no longer breathing. He just lied still with his eyes closed. The remaining nurses were still there removing the dextrose, etc. Mom was crying and she was whispering something to dad.
I could not move nor cry or say anything. How could that happen? He was getting better! Just an hour ago, he just ate apple and asked me to change the tv channel. And now he's gone?
I immediately informed my brother and sister that dad was gone. They asked me the same questions I kept asking myself - "What happened? I thought he was getting better? He just ate!" I didn't know the answer.
My Dad died on July 13, 2012. He was pronounced dead at 11:40 in the morning. Immediate cause of death was Cardio Pulmonary Arrest, antecedent cause was Massive Acute Myocardial Infarction.
Today, it has been almost 2 months since dad's death. It is still painful. I still cry. I still call on him to watch over us. I still wish he was still alive.
Your grandchildren miss you dad!They wrote this on your 40 days.
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| "Dear Grandpa, Where are you how are you there in heaven we miss you I love you grandpa" |
Dad, we all miss you. Wherever you are, we know that you are happy and peacefully resting. You are in a better place now, no more problems, you won't get sick anymore. Rest in eternal peace dad. We love you so much!
Tears In Heaven lyrics
Songwriters: Clapton, Eric Patrick; Jennings, Will;
Would you know my name
If I saw you in heaven?
Would it be the same
If I saw you in heaven?
I must be strong
And carry on
'Cause I know I don't belong
Here in heaven
Would you hold my hand
If I saw you in heaven?
Would you help me stand
If I saw you in heaven?
I'll find my way
Through night and day
'Cause I know I just can't stay
Here in heaven
Time can bring you down
Time can bend your knees
Time can break your heart
Have you begging please
Begging please
Beyond the door
There's peace, I'm sure
And I know there'll be no more
Tears in heaven
Would you know my name
If I saw you in heaven?
Would it be the same
If I saw you in heaven?
I must be strong
And carry on
'Cause I know I don't belong
Here in heaven
'Cause I know I don't belong
Here in heaven
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